Sunday, March 27, 2016

Memory and desire

Happy Easter!

I've been sitting here in bed feeling melancholic. I love Easter - the lambs, the chocolate eggs, the daffodils, the bright spring skies - but unless we have visitors, I start missing people and times gone by. Yesterday I was missing my best friend Mary, because I was back from a trip and wanted to ring her up for a thorough debriefing, as per usual, but she wasn't here; and she never will be here.

This morning I've been missing my mother, because I often used to take my children up to Wensleydale to stay with her and Pa at Easter. At least that's how I remember it. 

Once you start missing one person, you look around inside your heart and find other people who are inaccessible and you're filled with longing. 

I can't imagine how I'll feel if Dave dies before me. I'll probably drown in a sea of loneliness.

I was thinking all this when I sat here with my morning mug of tea. I switched on the laptop and while it warmed up, I read a two page story in my new Garrison Keillor bookthat I bought in Boulder -

and it made me laugh. I need comedy to get me through this life. Don't underestimate the power of a hearty belly laugh. Or even a wry smile.

Happy Easter!

No comments: