Wednesday, April 08, 2015


Have you ever woken up feeling low and spent the day that way, and not known if it’s because you’re tired, or because you had bad dreams (which lurk there, yet you can’t remember them) or if it’s because you miss your best friend – dead for six weeks – or your mother – dead for six years – or if it’s because you don’t know where life is going? Or is it just because it’s a sunny April day, and whereas the day before you were happy because of that, now you find yourself agreeing with T.S.Eliot…

April is the cruellest month, breeding

Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing

Memory and desire, stirring

Dull roots with spring rain.

I’ve just been looking for an April photo to illustrate this post and realised that the light is special in April (as it is in September but in a different way). It’s bright and beautiful and uncompromising, but the distance looks mystical. Look at it here:

april 09 026

There are people all over the world who are suffering. I know that. I feel it. I know that my troubles are trivial. I published this post because I like blogs where people share their feelings; and someone, somewhere, might find it helpful.

“We read to know we are not alone.” C.S.Lewis


Ash said...

Is today any better? I hope so.

marmee said...

missing someone is such a strange pain...itch you can't scratch. My best friend died a year and a bit ago and something happens that in all the world , only she would understand....or respond to in the way i am looking for, and how cross sad done down that makes me feel

Sue Hepworth said...

I am so pleased I wrote the post now; because someone, somewhere understands. Thank you, Marmee. I'm very sorry for your loss, too.
And thank you, "Ash" - I am feeling a little bit better today. Dave and I just walked down the Trail in the sunshine and sat outside at Hassop Station, and I had a late breakfast in the sunshine.

Ash said...

That sounds like a good start to the day - hope the day got better and better.

It was good to read the post, it really does help to know etc. although I wish it wasn't necessary for any of us.


Sue Hepworth said...

The day was lovely. thank you.