Monday, August 17, 2020

Vicarious living vs the real thing


I'm learning to enjoy a wider life vicariously. 

Zoë and family had a great week in Northumberland, Isaac and family went camping and rafting in Colorado for three days, and the family-member-who-declines-to-be-named and the lovely Jaine have just come home from sunny Croatia. Meanwhile my friend Het, who has been cooped up in a London flat for five months, has found freedom in Cornwall. 

It's genuinely heartwarming to think of them all getting away, because I am now over my temper tantrum that the trip with the sibs to Wensleydale in September is off the cards and I shan't be going away till next year.

Last week when I left Zoë's garden after a visit, she and I wanted to hug goodbye, and considered donning masks to do it. We didn't hug. We discussed the whole hugging thing and ended up with the younger grandson (14) hugging Zoë and pretending it was me. Odd, yes, but I did feel hugged.

Last week Dave found some 'tasty' bits of oak when he was clearing out his shed and he has been carving either Carpe diem (seize the day) or Viva hodie (live today) on all of them. He does multiples of everything he makes. These are the first ones he did. 



They sit on the stairs, so every time I go up to the loo I see them. 

He just finished these, and they are on the dresser:



A year before she died, my friend Mary had him carve Make each day count in some oak for her.

These are great sentiments, but I am burdened by them, because as I told you last week, I am already weighed down by this puritan on my shoulder urging me to use every minute productively.

I came across two quotes this morning, both of which I liked:

This last is from the writer and poet Charles Bukowski. I love the idea of death trembling.

So...here is this week's plan for living well - bike rides, picking flowers, drawing and painting. 

And when the sun comes out, Chrissie and I are going to get together in the garden and drink margaritas. I have never made them before, but I have the  recipe from a friendly bartender in Boulder, and I now have all the ingredients: 



Also salt. Because yes of course we'll have salt on the rim of our glasses.

Here's to a happy week, not looking at my feet.



7 comments:

Christine said...

Can't wait. But where is the sunshine? C xx

Elisabeth said...

I am really enjoying your posts Sue and rereading These are The Days - I read in bed just before sleep and I love the mixture of laughter (you writing yourself a post it note and then no idea of what it meant!) and the tender, open hearted way you speak about your mum.
Thank you - x

Sue Hepworth said...

Thank you so much for this, Elisabeth. It’s so encouraging.

Anonymous said...

Tasty bits of wood look fantastic. Love them - what happens to the duplicates? Are they for sale ? Jenetta

Sue Hepworth said...

I will ask the craftsman, Jenetta.

Anonymous said...

Hi Sue, sorry but I just had to smile when I saw the lovely oak signs as I realised the second needs an extra "o", i. e. should read Vive Hoodie for my aspie husband who last year discovered the joys of having a hoodie/hoody(?) which is now his favorite piece of clothing!

Sue Hepworth said...

I love this last comment from Anonymous.
And I too like hoodies!